For the first time...

...in this journey, tomorrow's weigh in will be a complete surprise. I haven't stepped on the scales since Thursday morning last week! I'm an every.single.morning weigher so this is a complete change for me. And I must say that I felt a teensy-bit out of control. I haven't felt accountable.

I think the biggest thing for me living out in the bush is that so many family and friends were concerned that I wouldn't be able to see out the 12 weeks because I'm 55kms away from the nearest gym or personal trainer. What they didn't understand was how committed I am to this journey. This lifestyle change. This LIFE change.

I am so focussed and SO motivated to lose this weight and to change the nasty habits that I had that it doesn't matter that the gym is not around the corner. It doesn't matter that I don't have 30 other people egging me on to get this done. And done right the first time. I've taken down my profile pic on facebook and haven't been one to share the ins and outs with friends. I share the good and bad with my husband and parents, but everyone else (except you!!) gets the kg figure.

I don't need the affirmations that I'm looking better - I can see it in the mirror!! They are absolutely wonderful, don't get me wrong, but they don't motivate me to workout harder or eat better. I make those decisions all day every day and am extremely proud of how I'm doing, and the absolute determination it takes to get it done.

So this week without my scales I've felt a little lost. It wasn't a conscious decision to not weigh myself... I've just been busy!! My sister in law gave birth to a little boy on Saturday 7 weeks early. They live in a country town 700kms from Perth that is not able to cope with antenatal or neonatal problems. So they flew her and her partner to Perth this week for tests. They induced her on Friday because bub was not growing as expected and a tiny 2lbs 10oz (1190g) baby boy arrived. He's breathing on his own and is doing well so far, but there is a long road to travel for them all. Having my mother-in-law visit was perfect timing because we could take her to Perth to see them all.

So over the last few days I've missed a couple of training sessions (one being my rest day) and the food has been a bit sporadic. I've eaten well, just had to choose some things that were slightly off the plan. I had a few treat days in there!

So tomorrow has me nervous. I'll let you know!